Thursday, October 13, 2005

Bad taste and black humour....

Do not read any further if you are sensitive or delicate. Do not read any further if you have cancer and take it terribly seriously because today's post is all about the really bad comments that I or friends of mine have made that have made me laugh. Believe me, black is the new humour and I have been laughing a great deal....

In pub man lights up next to me first asking if I mind. "No, " I say, " I already have cancer."

In pub, my glass is empty. I push it to a friend whom I have already bought a drink and say, "give to breast cancer, buy me a drink."

In staffroom someone brings in doughnuts. " You shouldn't eat those," I say, " they are carcinogenic" and help myself to one grinning.

Talking about my used to be huge libido to friend saying that all I want now is to curl up and sleep in someone' s arms. She says that that is how ALL women feel normally - welcome to the female race....

Self pity phase with brother and we talk of meeting up next week. He says not worth it as " you won't be here..."
Made me laugh....

Quite seriously though, it is very hard indeed to be scared by something one can laugh at.... Can you think of a sick joke?

(Oh, and if you found this all in extremely bad taste, you are absolutely right and normal service will be resumed sometime...)

Minerva

16 comments:

Londinium said...

you have a sick, sick mind, Min (not to mention breast)

Lx

Minerva said...

That is OUTRAGEOUS!
*laughing*

Minerva

Anonymous said...

Be careful talking about your libido online Minny.

We would n't want the rest of the world to know that you are a lymphomaniac


The Brother

3rdtimesacharm( 3T ) said...

Anything for laughs Minerva!
;-)(It's release and has healing powers)

But I honestly can never remember jokes. (in bad taste or not) I always just call my dad when I'm in need of some sick humor.

My mother went thru a two year battle with breast cancer, I wonder if he has any gems left.

HUGS
3T

doris said...

So really you are not so much a writer now as a stand-up comic LOL

You have a funny brother.... lymphomaniac indeed!

Oh yes, and you're British too. That accounts for it!

panthergirl said...

Oh I love these!!! This is totally how I would be dealing with your situation too, Min. I love that you can laugh at these things...they are truly hilarious.

They also remind me of my nasty BIL who smokes 4 packs a day but won't let my sister buy a microwave because, well, it can give you cancer!! LOL

littlefeet said...

again...you so rock!!!!

peace...

kenju said...

I love it, Minerva! We have to find the humor in every situation, and you sure have wtih these.

Rainypete said...

In pub man lights up next to me first asking if I mind. "No, " I say, " I already have cancer."

Hahahahahahahaha!!!

Try this one

It has been reported that the breast cancer rate would be cut in half if women would eat a low-fat diet. Now, if a woman has already lost half her breasts, can she go back to square one and eat a high-fat diet?

--or--

Doctor to patient: I'm sorry to have to tell you, but you have a very rare cancer for which there are no treatments and I'm afraid that you only have six months to live.

Patient: What do you suggest I do?

Doctor: Move to the middle of nowhere and live with an economist.

Patient: And how will that make me live longer?

Doctor: It won't. Six months will just seem longer.

Cocaine Jesus said...

Cocaine Jesus. That is one sick joke!

Jean-Luc Picard said...

The cigrarette joke was a brilliant one, Minerva. Sharp and to the point.

Doctor: I have bad news, you have seven days to live; what's worse, I should have told you last week.

OldHorsetailSnake said...

Great stuff, Minnie. Of course you should laugh about. ANYBODY could be sad.

How about this one that I tell on my site today:

In Oregon, if you're within 6 months of dying and you're in a lot of pain, you can get a big slug of barbituates and end it all. "We call this a 'killer app.'"

Jo said...

Rock n roll Minerva...the smoking joke is a corker...!

You think you're in bad shape? It could be worse. At least you don't think you're a moth.

A man goes to his doctor and says 'Doctor, Doctor. I think I'm a moth'.

The Doctor frowns, 'You don't need me, you should go and see a psychiatrist'

Man says 'I know. I was on my way, but your light was on.'

(Sorry!)

(Any excuse to get the chestnuts out. Will try and find a cancer joke next!)

Anonymous said...

knock knock
who's there
boo
boo who
don't cry it's only me

we'll be there for you as long as you need us and quite a bit more!
so many people love you - you are a star
The SIL

Minerva said...

Brother and SIL,
Thank you for your very 'punny' contributions... I wouldn't be able to face this thing without you...

Jo - just the kind of joke I LOVE...
I don't really like crude jokes, but jokes that just innocently make me laugh...Thank you...

Old Horsetail...
Love it...keep it up!

Jean-Luc - That really made me laugh! Thank you...

CJ - but I never laugh AT you....

Rainypete - your brand of optimism is irrespressible and I loved these two jokes!

Kenju - You are so right...and it does help laughing at it...

Monkey - right back at you....

Panthergirl - I LOVED the story about the microwave. I know so many people like that! Thank you....

Doris - Yes, we British are a strange lot aren't we?

Thank you all so much for your comments....

Dana said...

Just read this one...

Knock knock
Who's There
Ad-air
Ad-air Who
Ad-air once...but it all fell out:)

If you can't laugh...you know you're in trouble! Trust me, laughter will get you through...it did me!