What would you do if you only had six months to live? Seriously. It is now March and you have until October. What would you do?
Kids? Family? Travel? Write?
Where do your priorities fly to? What does your mind automatically dismiss and where does it dart to?
When asked this question yesterday, my mind immediately went to my children, my boyfriend, my family and enjoying each other and the time I would have left.
And today, I ask myself, if that is the case, if my children and my family are my be all and end all for being on this earth, are my life goal and when all is stripped away are what is most important, what am I doing today, tomorrow and the day after that to ensure that I keep my eyes and focus on what I consider the most important thing in my life?
What would you have answered?
Minerva
13 comments:
And I'd like you to answer what you think you'd do if you had 60 years to live eh?
6 months? Hmmm...
First of all, send round a circular to everyone I know saying 'Just because I have 6 months to live, do not expect me to come up with anything hugely profound or wise, or to become a Buddhist, or learn how to do Yogic Flying or anything.'.
And also 'If you owe me money, don't think you're off the hook. I still want it back.'
As for all the deeply spiritual stuff, I'm on to it...will think and come back to you.
'Anyone here who knows how long they have to live, please raise your hand.' Someone said that to me as a teenager and I've thought of it pretty much every day since then. It steers me.
Whether one has six months or 60 years, the answer should always be the same. Live for today.
I recall an old adage that says "Today is the very first day of the rest of your life"... as it for all of us. I believe I would only know at the end of every day what we all know... more than I knew yesterday but less than I'll know tomorrow. That being the case, I'd get out my crayons and color today beautiful and save the brightest colors for every tomorrow. That's what I think... but more importantly this is your life. How do you want to color your tomorrows? You are the artist and this is your painting.
Hi, Minerva: My friend whom I blogged about today (David M. Bailey) addressed this in a song called "One More Day". David was told he head a year or two at best. That was 10 years and 9 months ago! He went home after hearing this from that doctor and "Googled" about his form of Cancer only to discover a man in Indiana who went into remission and beat such a time frame. So, David called him up on the telephone and asked "Hey, man. How did you do it?" The guy said "You know something, I really don't know?" And quite correctly, David said to the audience of Oncology Nurses at the concert I snuck into that he wished to this day that his doctor would have added.."But you know something? There is a guy you should talk to in Indiana who's outcome is quite the opposite to our textbook stuff!"
So, may I say that I agree here with Jo and Melissa who answered before me! Overwhelmingly--I think, "Wow! There are so many people to whom YOU MATTER, including we mere Bloggers here. And I for one am focused on anticipating your remission first and then a gradual resumption of activities. I greatly admire your constitution and tenaciousness and feel that many Cancer-free people lack this or overlook it. How sad for them! This is a quality that I see in your favor.
In his song David answers your question in months, weeks, days, hours and minutes and in 30 seconds. But he does so with Hope. In fact, that's the title of his dual CD "HOPE". So shoot me an e-mail with your address information and I will wing an extra copy of it to you "Across the Pond"--with my compliments! See what you think! It is a great treat and I think it is terrific "medicine". I'll await your e-mail! :-)
What would I do?
I haven't the foggiest!
What wouldn't I do?
Work, spend time with people I don't like, worry about small stuff, say yes when I mean no...
Much easier to think about what I wouldn't want to waste my life on, but perhaps not the best way to view life...
What if 6 months turned into 6 years? Does that change your answer??
Everyone has answered so wisely. I think the most important thing is to do the things you would love to do with your family now, while you feel healthy enough to do them.
And that advice, my dear, applies to all of us...
xoxox
pg
here via michele today
Hi Minerva, I'm here from Michele's today. You have a very nice blog :)
Some people answer: travel, spend time with family/friends; do something wild/outrageous like skydive. Me? I honestly don't know. I don't have $ to travel right now, so I don't know where I'd get it for the next 6 months. I don't have a lot of family, and friends are busy and working. And I really don't think I'd overcome my fear of heights long enough to freefall from a plane. I do have a couple of talents I could expand on which would give me satisfaction and completion I suppose. But only if I had my health...
This is a hard question to answer realistically. I'll have to think about it further :)
i don't really know. i imagine a number of things that i would do. i currently have a friend who is battling cancer and has been given 3-5 years. we talked about the value of each moment, goals for each day, instead of 5-10 years, the uncertainty of everyone's life... yet, the truth is i don't know what choices i would allow myself as i managed the emotional intensity that must come with such realities.
i would hope, i could process the disappointment, anger and disillusionment and focus on dieing with dignity and purpose. family, friends, all seems to be important, AND i imagine the greatest relationship i would want to manage would be with myself and the Divine.
i don't know what i would do in those 6 months. i do know that you are an amazing person.
i do hope you will stay with us here as best you can, for in some way, your living and dieing brings more value to mine.
thank you.
That is a tough question Minerva, on the deepest level---at least it is for me....On the simplest level, well....
And I hope this doesn't sound really frivolous and stupid, but I would eat anything and everything I wanted and I would stop worrying about my weight! Screw that! Bring me some Eggs Benedict and Chocolate, please!
After that, I think I would try to see and be with everyone I wanted to see at least one more time, if not more. Hopefully make amends with people I need to do that with...not because I want to be sure I go to heaven, but because I think it would make me feel better. Part of my answer to this is based on the fact that I am two months shy of 76, so my perspective may be slightly different than many people much younger than me....
I would try to enjoy every moment and try not to worry about all the things I cannot change. I keep coming back to food. Eating would be a major part of visiting with all the people I care about. There is nothing like sharing a meal with those you so enjoy being with....And other than that...I think I would continue to take in all the beauty of nature that is around me. The Sun, The Sea, The View, The Flowers, my cat....Mostly though I think it would be spending time with the people I love and who love me.
Definitely *food for thought*.
Think I would just continue on living the same as now keeping my life simple.
Michele sent me to say "Hi".
xoxo
This is a really tough question, Minerva. And one I've asked myself since about age 30...just because.
I'd have to say that over the years my answers have changed tremendously. So I can't help but feel this came about because of age. Years ago, I would have answered...further my career, see my children grown, have grandchildren, travel, write, read more.
But having just turned 60...I guess I'd have to say...I wouldn't change very much. I guess I'd just keep living each new and glorious day. It's all relative, isn't it? And it's all so unfair.
Thinking of you and hoping you're doing okay.
Hi Minerva,
This has to be the question I live every day... as much as I can...I don't have a life threatening illness as far as I know - my Mum first had cancer (lymphoma) when I was 19 and I realised quickly how transient life can be...
Now I try to be more careful, more aware in some ways, about doing the things that matter - the things that make a difference to how people feel, or how I feel.
I came here via Carmi and thank you for sharing this part of your life so openly and honestly, Katie
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