The Joy of Forgetting.
I am one of those people who always forget where they have put things, especially keys. Every morning, every evening, I mislay them. I can't find them constantly at school forever looking 'in the last place' I had them for those miscreants. If you met me, you would see me ever searching pockets, bags and shelves for the elusive place where I put them last.
I have always cursed this terribly impractical memory of mine. Telephone numbers aren't a problem, but keys, glasses, books and wallet somehow sneak under the radar. At the moment though, I have to say that forgetting is a blessing, for I seem to be forgetting that I have cancer.
So very very strange. The first time diagnosed when I lived with my lump for a full six months before surgery it was the first thought in my head in the morning, and the last when I drifted away at night. It was constantly with me, holding my hand, grasping my steps, holding me back. Last year, when it came back, it was the same. It was something that I was trying to escape; that I saw in black and white. I either had it in me or it was gone, fleeing before the chemo or the surgeon's knife.
Today though, or rather at this time, for I mean it much more broadly than just this little space of 24 hours it really has just slipped my mind. I am busy making plans for tomorrow, next week, next month and even next year. I have a career plan that exceeds the next few months and plans for next Summer with my children and family.
A blessing indeed for it allows me to continue to live my life. I am relieved that people know for it allows me to continue without having to explain, but it does also give me a freedom to live as normal. How little we realise that to live normally is really one of the greatest privileges we have. We do see a little of it when we have flu, (even man flu!) or a hurt leg or arm, but it is even more the case when struck by a chronic disease or illness. Normalcy is not something to be despised but something which is worth more than a palace of gold, or a roomful of jewels.